9. 3 Personality Traits
This is hard for me, because despite having many conversations over the years with students in which I insist, “You aren’t your anxiety. Anxiety is just a Thing you’re dealing with, but it doesn’t define you,” I kind of have a hard time defining myself outside the realm of my anxiety. Not to say that I don’t feel like a realized human being, just that so many of the qualities I can think of that do define me are anxiety adjacent. Punctual, hard-working, being a good listener — all tangentially reflective of my anxiety. If I was pressed to find qualities apart from or further from the influence of that:
Good sense of humor. Or maybe an awful sense of humor, depending on how you regard things like this. I love to laugh, I find a variety of styles of humor and comedy funny (from relatively “high brow” to pretty damn “low brow”), I’m able to laugh at myself, and I’m generally good-natured.
Creative. My execution often leaves much to be desired because of my impatience (though I’ve been working on that, and the results are honestly pretty starkly different — the level of quality when I work slowly and steadily versus when I rush through things is startling), but I think I have good ideas, and I work well under constraints (I do my best work during challenges).
Nurturing. When people really need me — be they friends or students — I am good at working through things with them, at knowing how and when to give them space, how to approach them, how to offer support, or help, or comfort. It’s probably what I’m best at, and what I’m proudest of about my work.
10. Where I’ve Traveled
Honestly, I really haven’t. Between financial constraints (particularly while growing up) and the fact that for most of my life I’d labored under the impression that I couldn’t comfortably fly because my ears had drainage issues, I haven’t really traveled.
I think currently the list is:
And brief overnight stops (en route to other places) in Maryland and South Carolina.
Good morning from a sickie! I took the day today because I have actually full-on gotten sick (no fever, just a bad stuffy/runny nose, congestion, and sore throat) and I’m hoping this accounts either partially or fully for why I’ve felt so lackluster the last several days. Hopefully this is the apex of it, and I can be on the mend and start being more productive again, ideally by the weekend.
Sadly, this means I will definitively be missing the Poetry Hoot Open Mic tonight, which is too bad because tonight’s special guests are poets — students an staff — from my high school. And honestly, having attended my fair share of these Hoots, the student poets are often among the best I’ve ever seen read at these events. I wasn’t a hundred percent sold on going (I haven’t written in over a year, so I’d have had to choose an older poem, and I would have had to work out babysitting arrangements — possibly overnight, which is a pain when Bear has school the next day) but apparently my body decided for me. Not thrilled, but it does alleviate the burden of responsibility, and frankly I’ve got enough on my plate.
I’m going to see how the day plays out, with how I feel both physically and mentally, but ideally I’ll be able to both take care of some stuff around the house and have some much needed rest.
Tuesday. Keep your head up, shoulders back. Keep walking. Keep going.