28. What’s in My Closet
Every piece of clothing I own – we don’t do “winter” and “summer” clothes, here. Probably fifteen or so dresses, twenty-ish skirts, literal stacks of t-shirts, sweaters, and leggings, a few pairs of jeans, and lots of various tunics and button-downs. I have a double wide closet with shelving, and my clothing takes up more than 3/4ths of it. We also have a platform bed with under-the-bed storage comprised of eight drawers, and my stuff take up half of those (my husbands takes up 1/4th, with the remaining 1/4th being old Halloween costumes and bathing suits). I have a lot of clothes, and yet I’m generally dissatisfied with my wardrobe. I’d really like to curate a more signature look, but it’s hard when I feel like my aesthetic is about a dozen different things all at once.
29. How I Started Writing
I don’t remember not writing. The older I’ve gotten, the more sporadic and touch-and-go my writing has gotten, but when I was young, I remember writing (and drawing, come to that) all the time. The first thing I remember writing were several small books that all had essentially the same plot, wherein a princess gets attacked by a bear (in one version, a knight come and kills the bear to save her, in another she, like, gets mugged by the bear? And he takes her money and runs off? I was six, I don’t know). I also remember writing what was my first and likely only foray into self-insert, crossover fanfiction at age nine or ten, though looking back, I realize a lot of what I wrote would have been classified as some genre of fanfic (I’m completely okay with that, it’s just an interesting observation). I’m not a naturally overtly social person (though I like being around people and interacting with the people I’m comfortable with) and my parents were pathologically overprotective and isolating, so writing was a great way for me to pass the time and have something to occupy my mind.
I’m going to have to accept the fact that my A-to-Z sketches are going to be even more amateurish and, well, sketchy than my usual art, because I won’t have the luxury of limitless time (sure, I’m still on lockdown, and I defintiely have more time than I normally would, but I also have a kid, another monthly challenge, and I’m taking on a flexible schedule for Camp NaNoWriMo because I need to get all the fanfic stagnanting on my Google Docs done and out of there, damn it).
I’m currently art blocked as hell, and the above observation was made because I tried sketching out some ideas for possible A-to-Z entries yesterday. Yesterday was a highly self-critical day (don’t know why, nothing different about the day than any other day since lockdown started), so maybe I’ll feel better about things when the challenge actually starts, but I’m not holding my breath. Much like Inktober, this will be entirely for practice and to prove to myself that I can complete such a challenge. And to be fair, I stumbled upon my Inktober 2018 drawings while deep-diving on Facebook last night, and holy hell, I have legitimately improved. I’m still amateurish and clumsy, but so, so much better than I was a year and a half ago. Clearly regular practice helps, so that’s what this is — a month of regular practice.
I’m wondering if part of the reason I suddenly became “art blocked” is because a part of me knows that I will be doing the A-to-Z challenge in a few days and I shouldn’t start a new project with that one looming on the horizon. On the flipside as well, if this goes well, I can always start turning to song lyrics to inspire future art.
It’s gray out today. I know I haven’t been leaving the house, but it’s amazing how much of a difference sunlight — even just sunlight filtering through my curtains — makes in my over-all mood and energy. I didn’t even get out of bed until past 9 am, which is insanely late for me, and have yet to really delve into my dailies. Actually, I’ve yet to figure out what my “dailies” constitute today.
The house is kind of a mess, but not so bad I can’t integrate it into our routine for tomorrow (Bear has actually gotten kind of into the idea of cleaning the kitchen and putting away dishes), and I do have all those books to read…
It’s Sunday. Today may be a pretty lazy day, but isn’t that what Sunday’s were meant for?
Stay safe, sane, and healthy — and so much as you can, stay inside.
(Also, apropos of nothing, I am almost definitely hearing a chicken outside, but I live in the middle of a highly urban area and already had one next door to me two apartments ago, how many people in this city could possibly keeping illicit chickens and how do I keep ending up with them for neighbors?)